Steve K.

This is my brain on LiveJournal.

Dream: Christmas Tent Romance
I was taking a nap this evening, and I had this strange dream that seemed a bit like a romance movie with all the fixings of your typical romance.

I'm pretty sure it was much longer than the portion that I recall, but I first remember taking down a giant sleeping tent that could fit an entire wedding party. The tent did have a typical nylon fabric floor to it like any regular sized sleeping tent would have. I was inside the tent removing random little parts of the tent frame that needed to come out.

I recall that the tent was set on a hill with very few trees nearby and tall grass you would typically see near the ocean, but elsewhere short trimmed green grass like a farm field. I don't recall seeing any sandy beach, so perhaps it was set up in a place like Maine or England where there are rocky beaches. And while I was in the tent, the tent caught some wind and floated down to another part of the field where the rest of the tent pieces were being laid out.

There was a lady I was pursuing in this dream, and she asked me some kind of situational question like, "what would you do if someone did X while you weren't paying attention?" I knew that she was looking for an answer out of me because she was testing me. I told her I didn't really know because I'd never been in a situation like that before, so I couldn't imagine how I'd react.

Now I was being very smooth and efficient in removing base pegs, small rods that the tent poles slip into at the base of each section of the tent. In this activity I had one of those out-of-body observe-the-situation events where I was watching myself interact with this lady who had now climbed into the deflated tent that I was working on. I was being played by Tom Cruise, and I can't remember the name of the actress who played by lady interest.

We were soon joined by another adult man who I presumed was my lady's brother, who I believe had an incestuous crush on his sister, but I couldn't really tell. He had curly brown hair that was more like a very thin wig that wouldn't stay on his head. His head was round (obviously), but this wig was somewhat square in shape so it either would slide off or would look all folded and unsightly where the squareness of it met the roundness of his head. His looks reminded me of Ryan Phillippe from the movie Cruel Intentions.

Now the scene switched from being in this tent to being in a very old dark polished wood sitting room with some older gentleman lounging around while we continued what seemed to be a concealment of information from the lady's brother because apparently he was OCD and would know about every little detail that was out of order. We were still in a crouched position at the edge of the room that was formerly the tent.

What we noticed was out of order were the red Christmas candles that were normally set around the room. Instead of being set on tables and shelves, a few seemed to be knocked off things and laying on the floor, or removed from their stands and set on a lower shelf. Everyone in the room was telling everyone else not to say anything until the brother came in the room and immediately noticed what was out of line. The older relatives in the room argued to get some sense into him about there really not being an issue, but he wouldn't listen and insisted on things being just so.

That situation went on for a bit until I woke up.

Dream: City Thunderstorm
I had this odd dream this morning about weather and houses. I was in a house doing something like games with a group of my friends including Stephen, Matt and Gwyn, and Sarah and I'm not sure who else. There was a thunderstorm approaching and I was now trying to get a good position to place my camera to capture it.

Now, we went outside into the yard and took a look toward where the storm was coming from, and we were now in the thick of a city with tall buildings all around. Stephen suggested I go up and take pictures from one of the tower buildings. The first idea was a bank tower, which was all glass sided and looked a bit like a metal obelisk with a pyramid top. That idea was quickly shot down because it was certain that the building guards wouldn't let us go up to the top to take pictures of all things in a bank building.

So we climbed into a really old tank of a car driven by an acquaintance of mine, Dwayne. He had trouble starting the car but eventually did. Then we pulled around the block to get on a main road to travel to a different tower in the city. In addition to myself in the passenger seat and Dwayne driving, Sarah climbed in the seat behind me, and I believe Stephen on the other back seat.

As we got to the intersection on the main street, there were two utility vans that had been in a strange accident where their gas tanks had both collided and were leaking gasoline. One of the vans was hoisted in the air by a large crane while firefighters were attempting to put out a fire in near the gas tank. But the flames weren't going out and the crane managed to drop the van on the ground right in front of where we were stopped. I dived out of the car to try to get away from the van, but it seemed to roll in my direction and I had to keep scurrying away and hoping the van wouldn't explode. The rest of the passengers in our car got out and backed away up the street we came from.

And that's about all I remember before waking up.

Dream: Peaches and Parties
The first thing I recall, I was at a large birthday party at my parents' house and a bunch of kids were out playing soccer in the backyard. There were also adults up on the deck watching or preparing food.

I was playing soccer and one of the girls playing was trying to get the ball away from me, but most of the time I had deliberately given her the ball so I could take it back moments later. Eventually, she took possession of the ball and laid down on it so her back was on the ground, her feet up at her hips, and the ball between her bent knees. We were in the middle of the yard and while she laid there I took the ball back from her and went down field toward the goal. When I was nearing the goal and the other kids on the opposing team, someone, who I could only describe as an old witch in appearance, yelled at me that a timeout was called and she had blown the whistle that was around her neck. I told her I didn't know and that I didn't hear the whistle.

At this point...Collapse )

Dream: Oranges and Bullet Time
This morning I had an interesting dream that makes little sense with my current events.

To start, I was in an art studio. We were making leather basketballs, but it seemed like we were doing plaster of Paris with stripes of leather instead of doing leatherwork. I believe I could identify my cousin among those making these basketballs.

We then walked out of this rather typical high ceiling, tan-colored art room, through a large poorly finished hallway and into an adjacent room. Mind you, these rooms had no doors, just wide openings.

In this adjacent room, there was a basketball hoop set up, and we were testing out our basketballs by shooting some hoops. I seemed to be the most competitive, and also one of the few men doing this.

Now, also in this room, near the hoop, was a large tree that looked like a maple, but had near-ripe oranges on it. A family friend, Kevin, was up the tree on a ladder checking for ripe oranges.

While Kevin did that, I noticed a clump at arm's reach. Upon closer inspection, I noticed that they had large clean holes through them, as if they had been eaten through by an insect.

This analysis quickly gave way to a different conclusion. The tree was now standing outside, and these holes were carved by bullets.

I turned around and was now playing the role of a police partner. My partner had arrested a man after pulling him over. It was dark out, and I was now approaching the vehicle.

I now spotted a bit of movement in the car. It was clear that this second person was hoping that we'd leave with the other guy and not notice them.

I notified my partner of the second person, stuck my gun out and ordered the second person out of the car. They climbed out on the opposing side of the car and stood there. I told him to put his hands in the air, but then noticed he held a gun.

The man told me he had the gun pointed straight at my head. I knew I held a .45 caliber pistol at his head. I ordered him again, but this time he fired his pistol. In a bullet-time scenario, the bullet passes through the two car windows and hit me on the left side in the middle torso. My left hand went to the wound and I could feel it start to bleed at each pulse of my heart.

The man just stood there, and in the same slowed way, I fired a shot at his head which passed to his right and through the hood of his sweater. I fired a second shot which hit him square in the forehead. He feel over dead as I started to collapse on the side of the road.

I then woke up. It was some time past four in the morning, the window was open and a train was passing through the area far off in the distance as the peepers continued their chorus.

Dream: Paralysis Therapy
Had a very strange dream this morning with only my immediate family in it. My parents, my two brothers and I were in it.

For some unknown reason, my younger brother, Matt, was paralyzed in an unusual way. I remember three stages or scenes and three behaviors or responses from us.

In the first stage, or scene, Matt was on the ground and was not able to get up on his own accord. However, it didn't seem like he was completely immobile. My brother, Tom, was on the ground with him with a hand on him in what seemed like a form of therapy. Matt was essentially learning to move forward and backward with his hands. It seemed like his legs could move, but they weren't very effective in doing anything. Tom seemed to be showing a positive attitude of encouragement during this scene. This took place outside somewhere on a very green lawn.

This transitioned to a second scene, or stage, where my father was now disciplining him for his current situation. A part of this scene I saw my mother try to take part in whatever my dad was doing to help Matt, but my dad quickly pushed her back. Then he rolled a bottle of some drink back toward her. The drink was pink with some kind of white syrup settled against the sides like it wasn't fully mixed. This scene also took place outside on a green lawn, plus I noticed old stone walls and rich white buildings at the edges of this rather large yard. It was much larger than our yard, like a manner or estate. I sensed an attitude from my father of anger with himself, as though he blamed himself for something, and there was also one of discipline.

This transitioned to a third stage or scene. In this stage we moved from a lawn to a pool of water. It was now I who was the player in helping Matt. It wasn't my decision to do this swimming therapy, but it was suppose to help. It still seemed like he couldn't use his legs, so I had the idea that some kind of swimming apparatus would allow him to move on his own.

I had this idea, which I voiced, that I could somehow spend my days programming some kind of suit that would let him move around on his own. I also stated that I'd probably be a rich man if I could solve his problem.

We went from this idea to swimming through a rather man-made cave. Some sort of voice was now narrating some kind of calm, soothing words on what we were suppose to believe or think. I swam up to the surface of the water in this very light colored cave. As I surfaced, the voiced narrated us to breath. This therapy, by that, was intended to relax and energize.

After I did breath, I woke up.

I noticed that these three stages and attitudes were very similar to what Matt may have experienced growing up: an early sense of encouragement from Tom, and my not understanding things as a young sibling; an attitude of discipline from my dad, the fear of that discipline, and my mom getting out of the way (dad being the tough parent); and later learning together to swim on our own and make our own decisions.

Dream: Secret Genius Society
So I had this dream this morning that was rather interesting. I don't recall whether I was watching this in a movie, or if I became part of the story part way through.

The first I recall, I was observing a conversation on what looked like a very nicely spaced out ivy league campus. There was a road behind where I was observing and there was a grassy hill that sloped up and to the left where the road led. There were pine trees clumped together to the right and there was an institutional building on top of the hill that would remind you of those old sanatoriums.

Directly where I was observing there was a phone terminal, not a full booth. There was a girl at the phone who had just dialed a number she apparently already know. She was asking a young man in front of her, toward the hill, what the code was.

The young man was explaining how dialing this number and speaking a name would automatically decide the band that would play at a certain high-class private venue. He finally gave her the pass code, she dialed it, and then gave the name of someone, then hung up. That was all there was to the phone activity; just state a name and the associated band would be picked for this venue. This was outside of the normal thinking of everyone else who attended, but wasn't intimately involved in the operation of the venue.

Soon enough, we transitioned to this venue in this very strange movie-like way. I observed the band room very far off and many rooms away from us. We passed through the rooms as if passing through the hallowed out center of a round beige phone speaker. Each wall we passed through transitioned in the same fashion. I'm not really sure how many walls we transitioned through, but it was at least five.

Finally in this room, the announcement of this band was made, and they came out with their instruments. The room itself was kind of dark, with some light still coming in from the tall but few windows to the right side. The walls seemed to be tanned with age, and the dark floor and framing along with the weak light of a chandelier completed the image of this old place.

The band itself made me think what it'd be to take the lyrics and aggression of a band like Rammstein and changed its accompaniment to an indie rock band from Britain. It was absolutely terrible and awkward. The lead singer didn't sing all that much and his skinny, bald bass guitarist shouted his few lyrics out with this stare that would make you think he was on heavy stimulant drugs.

After they finished their song, everyone was kind of cringed back in their seats and not applauding at all. It was as if nobody in the room understood how this band was voted onto the stage this evening. And that is when it became a little obvious that the guy from earlier was probably in trouble for making it obvious that this vote was rigged.

We transitioned from this to the other side of the same room where couches were set around a television and my family as well as Gwyn's family were watching some artsy drama movie. I think the movie was part of my collection, and I had a good opinion of it in my mind, but I knew that some people wouldn't agree with some of the sensualities in it, which were things I generally glazed over.

Now, one of these scenes came up and while most of us were just ignoring the scene, my mom chimed in and started talking about one of my other movies and stated how we'll have to watch it on an open evening because of how long it was. Not a whole lot more was said, but the movie she mentioned was brought to my mind, but I still don't know what its name was.

This shortly transitioned to a commotion behind us. I looked behind and there were rows of white folding chairs set up behind us in this room. The floor was making some strange noises and this man, which I think as the man from the beginning of the dream, was at first sitting in one of the chairs in the middle on the right side of the divide, which would make you think we were in a church service.

The noise came louder and toward him. He got up in a panic and started backing up down the isle and knocking over a few of the chairs until he reached the back wall. He and another person suddenly fell through the floor. I noticed now that the floor was made of these very glossy metallic tiles as if it was a floor that could open up anywhere in the room.

He fell through the floor and was now standing in the large room with 40 foot ceilings that was vastly wide and futuristic in nature. There were now five people huddled together in this large room, and one other person. This person appeared to spend most of his time in this place doing scientific work of some kind. There were two rows of mechanistic work tables parallel each other and down the whole length of this very clean environment. The room was also dimly lit and the walls and equipment had a sheen to it like it was all made of bronze plating. It wasn't yellow like gold or brass, and it wasn't silver, but was like a silvery brown metal color.

The group of five knew this wasn't good and they assumed that someone was going to come out and beat them to death for whatever their crime was. The person who was working there noticed their presence and rushed out of the room to the right side. I was observing the room from high up and at an angle that would associate with the left rear of the upper room looking down and to the right front which faced toward the rear and a little to the right of the vast room below.

The man walked around a corner in the rear right of the huge room and into a side hallway lined with floor-to-ceiling cases with people inside. It might make you think of the think tank in the LEGO movie, but much less LEGO and far more smooth and futuristic. Each of these tube-like cases held a person standing upright but in stasis of some kind.

As the man walked into this chamber, he called out a Doctor something, I couldn't make out the name besides being a doctor. After he called the name twice, the stasis cases slid up a man's height to reveal an additional row that was below the floor until now. A case opened up and this man stepped out with a strange torso that was like squarish chrome rings layered one on top the other.

He stepped out in very stiff robotic movements and in a running stance the whole time. In a few seconds the stasis wore off and he ran out toward the man who called in a very fast smooth sprint. Now his head had changed from what was a human looking head to a more lizard-like head with a long snaking neck and rough, reptile red skin.

He ran out to the other room where these others were all standing in a group. I was now tracking his view as he walked through this huge room toward the others. There were two people who included the young man from the beginning and some very old gentleman both standing on the right of the group. In the middle two young girls stood together. On the left was a middle-aged man who I perceived as the girls' father. This father was spraying a small portable bottle of air freshener toward the two girls.

This genius doctor that the caretaker woke from stasis took great offense at the spray bottle because we were all in a room designed for scientific experiment and the chemicals in the spray bottle could damage some of the equipment in a room like this.

As the doctor got nearer to the group, he spat out and insult at this father saying something like, "there are two kinds of people, and the dim-wits like you are the type to not realize the stupid things they are doing." The father in turn tried to explain how he was just trying to freshen the air in this place. As he stated this, my view panned around and behind the father facing toward the rear of the room and the doctor. I observed in the very rear of this space-ship of a lab this column in the very back that was a massive room-height air scrubber that looked like a waterfall designed especially to purify the air in the room. It was even spraying out moist clean air into this metallic brown environment.

My view panned back further as the doctor essentially face-palmed and then proceeded to press this group of individuals further toward the front of the room and into a corner where he could strangle them out of their stupidity.

As I panned back, we passed by a long table with a bunch of Italian food set out like a pot-luck supper. It was already looking a bit bare from the supper that was going on at the time. I thought to myself that I hadn't eaten any supper yet, but this Italian food is probably cold already, so I'll just wait for the cookie/dessert table to be set out and have dessert instead.

And then I woke up.

I could tell you the wall of geniuses in stasis are probably an influence of The LEGO Movie I recently watched. I can also say there is a supper tonight which probably influence the supper here. Much of my family is going to the supper, which is why they were all together watching a movie (but not Gwyn and her family in reality). I've not much insight into what the rest of the dream speaks toward.

Dream: Concerts, Carpool and Exorcism
The first thing I recall in this dream is coming from a Chinese eatery with a group of friends, about 4 friends with me, and we had little take-out boxes of leftovers from our dinner. We were on our way to a church service of sorts.

We arrived at the church. I observed that the room was somewhat shallow with very high ceilings. The sanctuary was very wide to accommodate attendees, and there were standard church pews for seats. They were about to sing a worship song, and when we, me and a girl with me, were expecting to see the lyrics displayed on a large television to the right of the stage, it ended up that they were singing from hymnals instead. So as the congregation started singing the words, we quickly fumbled to find the right hymn in the books after feeling kind of dumb for expecting lyrics on the screen.

In the midst of singing the hymn, the orientation of the room changed and I found myself with my group of friends and most of us had musical instruments with us. It was my understanding now that we had just come from playing a concert with our instruments and now also our Chinese take-out. We were trying to be quiet while watching a dance production on stage.

On stage, the dance was rather abstract and the dancers were wearing these black leotards with a translucent white dress over top, and this included the guys who were involved. I recall one of the guys rolling across the stage like this, then for some weird reason the girls who were dancing pulled up their outer dresses so it was more like they were just wearing their leotards. And we were a bit weirded by this production at this point. My old friend Kristin was apparently involved in this production, and she refused (not sure if it was deliberate) to pull up her outer dress like the others had done.

At this point, the attention switched to my friends and I. One of my friends (not sure who) was sitting next to a guitar owned by another friend who sat juxtaposed to the guitar. Apparently this guy had an urge to pluck the strings on the guitar, and interrupted this rather silent dance production when he did. This repeated a couple times until he finally stopped doing this.

However, at this point, my old college friend, Dave, was behind the two of them, and he reached down and started strumming the guitar, which made everyone stare at our group. He stopped until everyone looked back at the stage, but then did it again. And finally he just went all out and started playing the guitar, which got my friend (the guitar owner) rather upset that these guys were playing her guitar. Then Dave went even more crazy and picked up the guitar and started playing the lowest string with his tongue, which I thought was really gross and very disturbing of the performance. I stood up and looked angrily at Dave, not knowing exactly how to handle the situation without getting the entire congregation upset with us.

But at this point, the priests of the church were so upset that they dragged Dave out of the church. Then we were picking up our stuff and walking outside. And now the priests were aimed to exorcise the demons out of Dave with prayers and proclamation, and with holy water which they were sprinkling at him from colorful beach pails.

It was apparent that this wasn't working, and so Dave rushed away from them and straight into the street, as though he was truly crazy or demon possessed. As his foot landed on the yellow stripes in the road, two vehicles passed in opposing directions and narrowly missing Dave. Despite this dangerous crossing, Dave continued across the street just narrowly missing the car in the opposing lane, and rushed off into the park across the street without missing a beat.

Now the church was emptied out except for one woman who was the priest/pastor of this church. We were going to leave, but we were a bit afraid for this woman's wellbeing if by any chance Dave were to return in his crazed state and seek to harm her in some fashion. We decided that a few of us would stay by the church as I went to get the car and return, and we would wait at the church while this priest finished her business and left for the evening.

I got to my car in the process of this discussion over how the whole arrangement would work. My car was parked between a pillar and a wall inside a rather large warehouse of a garage in an old apartment complex with an arched entryway. And so the arrangements were made and I started my car.

Now I got into the car and pulled around the pillar and out onto the street. And now the notion was that I was by myself and not picking anyway up, and I went right onto the highway bridges and found myself speeding along and having trouble figuring out which exit to take to get onto I-87. It appeared that none of the interstate signs had I-87 printed on them, and I was now trying to figure out which highway connected to I-87.

I finally picked one and that brought me strangely to this place that looked a bit like a platform video game scene where I had to reach certain points by jumping around and then answering questions. I found now that if I right-clicked my mouse that it would give me the correct answer to a set of spacial questions that were prompted at certain points on this platform area.

And then I woke up.

Dream: Dungeons and Dinner Party
For once I've had another dream I've been able to recall enough to write down.

I was at someone's house and we had this plan to play a game that seemed to be a form of Dungeons and Dragons, but with LEGOs. The idea was that two teams would build these giant 3-4 foot tall fortresses, and then lay siege to the opposing team's fortress. We had these big bins of LEGOs that were mostly Castle-type pieces.

My brother, Matt, and I were putting together our fortress with a tall draw-bridge that entered into a spire of a fort. Below the draw-bridge was a sub-floor with a secret entrance into the fortress with bars and camouflage to keep it hidden. I was handed or picked up a large door from the LEGO bin, with a bunch of hinged plates apart of it. I was trying to take them apart so that I could use them as pieces for the hidden doors of the secret entrance.

After I took the hinges off the large gate/door, they suddenly were a bunch of antique silver dinner knives. The knives had two engraved lines doing down the center of the handles and flaring out toward the butt of the handle. The lines were not sleek, but pressed sort of like very tiny flowers making up dotted lines. The strange thing was that the various knives were not all of the same length, and it bugged me that there wasn't a way to order them properly.

I recall Sarah was there at this dinner party mostly watching what Matt and I were doing. We were explaining some things, and she was giving rather simple comments like, "neat!"

Around the same time I was sorting out the dinner knives, I observed a large number in my hands, of which I separated out eleven of various sizes. I also observed five knives already set in places at the dinner table, making a total of sixteen knives picked out.

The dinner table was in the right corner of the room and was rather poorly lit. Actually, the whole room was at a candles brightness with more cold dusk light shedding into the house from the windows.

To the left of the dinner table under one of the windows was a table of food. I noticed my friend, Beverly, arriving from the left with food in hand, which she keenly set on the food table. Sarah remained standing next to me between the LEGOs and the dinner stuff. And around this time I woke up.

It was my assumption that if the dream continued on, some sixteen people would have dinner and pick out lego minifigures and play this elaborate battle of fortresses.

This is an observation on the subject of infinity as argued by Ben Askin and Dan Courtney. The debate was pointed out to me by my good friend Shaun Fowler. This is in regard to the statement made in the Westminster Confession, Chapter 2, paragraph 1.

"I. There is but one only, living, and true God, who is infinite in being and perfection, a most pure spirit, invisible, without body, parts, or passions; immutable, immense, eternal, incomprehensible, almighty, most wise, most holy, most free, most absolute; working all things according to the counsel of His own immutable and most righteous will, for His own glory; most loving, gracious, merciful, long-suffering, abundant in goodness and truth, forgiving iniquity, transgression, and sin; the rewarder of them that diligently seek Him; and withal, most just, and terrible in His judgments, hating all sin, and who will by no means clear the guilty."
Continued...Collapse )

Pro Tip: Ejecting the DVD drive on Ubuntu Linux
Here to save the day once again, I am now on the path to creating some really custom PHP web scripts on my home server with the intention of converting church sermons to MP3 files for automated upload to a website. But I came across a small snag that Ubuntu documentation, manpages and most of the web don't really speak much about.

When I tried to run 'eject' on the dvd drive, PHP threw an error "unable to open '/dev/sr0'" (My DVD drive).

I found an original solution over at, which recommended that the executing user (in this case, the Apache web server user) be added to the 'optical' group.

If you haven't figured it out by looking at your '/etc/group' file, Ubuntu Linux strangely name this the 'cdrom' group.

So, if you want to eject one of your optical drives with a web server, don't forget to give it the permissions it needs. If your Apache user is 'www-data' in Ubuntu:

gpasswd -a www-data cdrom

OR, edit /etc/group:


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